Grief and Loss: Can you grieve a bird?

Last May my partner convinced me to invest in a pet lovebird because 
a. they are clean 
b. easy to care for 
c.a diversion from getting another dog. 

I met Flona in May and instantly became attached to her. She did not share my admiration in the beginning but after hard work and constant bonding we were bonded. She was always with me and I was always with her. She sang Beyonce and Selena songs with me and watched as I danced around my small apartment. She passed away last Tuesday and I am still so so sad. 

                   

                                                  

I will forever miss how she watched me intimately apply my makeup, how she would "braid" my hair and most of all I will miss her singing. So can you grieve a bird? I say hell yes and call me llorona chillona but I miss my Flona forever.

Selena:The Icon

When I was a young girl I LOVED Paula Abdul, Mariah Carey and Barbie. I loved them all so much but felt frustrated because I didn't look like them. I was so frustrated in fact, that when I was 5 years old I tried to rub my brown skin off so I could be lighter like Barbie. Then one day my world changed. My mom brought home a cd of a girl who looked like me, spoke a language familiar to me and I could feel her spirit in her songs. At 7 years old my world changed when SELENA was introduced to me. Since then I have spent hours recreating her outfits, makeup looks, dance moves and songs. Somewhere in my fathers collection of home videos are hour of embarrassing Selena footage of me. Well either embarrassing or majestic. I still adhere to the Selena essentials for me everyday look: hoops, eyeliner, manicured nails and long hair. My bangs had a lifetime from 1994-2001 but have since retired. Reflecting on my love for Selena not only as my style Icon but as my Idol has me wondering….do other people care about her as much as I do? Did she make a difference on other people like she did me? I read a few articles here and there about her but I wonder…how has Selena impacted your life? 

 This is one of my most favorite Selena looks and I have dreamt of recreating this outfit but I think my bustier days are over…or are they?

 ICONIC. So many recreations of this. Someday my daughter will have this outfit.

 Gorgeous.

 I would recreate this look today and am searching for pieces to custom make my own mirror dress.

Iconic. This is one of my go to hairstyles. She's so beautiful!

Lotion has become my best friend

It took three weeks before my hands became chapped, grey (gray) and bleeding. Arizona is dry but Denver is a whole other Enchilada (smothered). My partner is from the middle east and I thought my biracial skin was dry but his is intense. I have been experimenting with hand creams to survive Denver weather for four years now and I have finally found three that work for my skin, one that works for my partners and another that has to be the worst hand lotion for the mile high city (in my opinion).

(excuse the manicure as nails are not my forte)

#1! L'Occitane hand cream has to be the best hand cream for this weather by far. This is the only hand cream where my partner's hand don't bleed and the moisture lasts half the day. For myself, the moisture lasts a bit longer than him but when I can afford it this is my go to.

#2. I love EOS products because they are inexpensive, nice packaging and they work! This hand cream was a pleasant surprise but I have tried their shave cream and lip balm and I must say their product line works great for my skin. I rank this one two because I find myself applying this one at least three times versus L'Occitane (just twice). 

#3. Tony Moly. I saw this at Urban Outfitters and was intrigued by the packaging, however, it is really moisturizing! My favorite is the peach because it smells great, moisturizes and is a great conversation starter. Trust me. Whenever this is on my desk people ask me "umm what is that" or I get certain looks. As a social worker there is no greater joy than to observe human behavior and this hand lotion benefits my humor and skin! Its also price friendly :) oh and my partner loves it but wouldn't dare carry around a peach in his backpack. 

L'Occitane Gel hand cream. This product may work well in other areas of the world but for Denver, CO I would not recommend to my worst enemy although I don't have a worst enemy but I digress. As wonderful a brand L'Occitane is this one actually dried out my and my partners hands which in Denver is a no no. So for those of you who suffer from dry hands you can knock yourself out and try or consider not because not only do your hands look awful they burn. 

There a million hand creams to review and I have tried over 50 but I wanted to showcase my most memorable experiences. I don't really know if my skin tends to lean more on the European side or Mexican side but there is both so I can't just go willy nilly with product. Its all trial and error.

From the desert heat to the mile high city I still struggle with how to remain true to myself but adapt to my new home (and by new I mean home of four years). I went from dressing similarly to a Kardashian to "functional". I shudder at the sight of snow yet in the summer I feel the most free I have ever felt. My skin is so dry, my hair breaks off more, some days I can't breathe and I'm always cold but in this amazing city I am finding my place.

I invite you all to join me on this journey of staying fashionable in the cold weather, layering, proper skin care technique to survive the high elevation and dryness and finally skincare and makeup tips for Latinas and biracial beauties. Most importantly I invite you to join me on a journey of staying true to self through expression.